Scratch That.

Blue flashing light yesterday morning, the competition is to run through 10rings, in order, as quickly as possible. Not too difficult. You get items, and seemingly it only ever seems to be one mushroom. My time so far is 1:15.

I also bought Super Mario Galaxy, so I now have Rosalina. It’s not a bad game. I’m just down to Dry Bones [Star on 150CC] and Mii Outfit B [All ghost data unlocked]. My online points aren’t doing so bad. Sticking around the 7500 mark at the moment.

I really wanted that job at the RSPCA. But I just got a rejection letter through.

Remind me what there is to live for?

That’s the only bloody job I wanted.

This week really hasn’t been a good one. I finally admitted to my boyfriend how I feel about life in general, which no-one in “the real world” knows. But I feel more distanced from him than ever.
Maybe it was a mistake telling him those feelings to that depth? On Monday, I really needed him, but he wouldn’t even pick up the phone. I told him I needed someone and he said he could text. I said stuff was wrong, he still said he could text. I said I needed someone on the phone, he said he could text. There was someone with him who he hasn’t seen in a long time, but I needed him. They may well have not seen each other for a long time, but she’d only stayed at his for 3nights the previous week. I think as his girlfriend I deserve some attention. I explained to him the next day how I was feeling and all he could say was sorry and I never told him I was feeling that bad. He didn’t even give me a chance to explain how bad I was. Just more concerned with who he was with. *sigh*

We’re also meant to be communicating more this week, but we’ve talked on the phone once in 7days. I think that’s a bit fucking ridiculous. And no doubt he’s talked to others on the phone.

I’m just so down but I really don’t get why, I keep crying and the tiniest thing sets off these moods. I kind of reverted back how I used to be when I was with my mother. I got so upset with my Step Mother last night I ended up hurting myself. I just wanted to walk out of the house. But I was scared if they’d let me back or not. I just … I’m not sure where to go anymore.

Part of me thinks it’s time to make that Doctors appointment, but it’s also something I never want to do.

Other than that, I’ve done pretty much nothing this week. How exciting am I?

Monday I saw the grandparents, that was not fun. I got a lecture about anything you can imagine grandparents giving you a lecture about. Woohoo.

Yesterday I went to Brighton to meet someone, left my house at 8:30am and didn’t arrive until midday! I met his bunnies and then we went to the beach, and just talked. It was good. Good to actually talk to someone like that for once. Someone who can kinda understand about how I really feel every day. I got sunburn though. Whoops. So now I have to moisturise my skin. Fun.

Annnnnnnd, my parents are being gay about the internet again. Wankers.

Not much of a holiday really, when the parents are home! Went bowling with the boyfriend on Friday. Had some issues, and had a HUGE talk, basically I felt walked over and shit and told him I thought it’s about time I stood up for myself in the relationship. He said my requests weren’t unreasonable and that he would try. However, he doesn’t want to bring me down so will let go if he feels his problems are affecting us. To which I said I’m tired of fighting on my own, and if he continues to let go I will let go also. So, hm, yeah.

Saturday my younger sister and I went out to see Fool’s Gold, not a bad film I don’t think. Parents got a bit stressy, and today I did nothing, pretty much.

I played a bit of Mario Kart, and watched some TV. Thrilling, eh?

Tomorrow is going to be uber fun — the grandparents!

I had a huge blue light flashing in my room last night, and it was obviously shining out of my Wii. Mario has started it’s first competition, you have to race around the Mario Circuit and you can submit as many times as you like. I’m currently at about a measly 1:52. Slowly shaving it off. It’s a race with 11 other characters and that chomping ball is doubled and moving around the track. So you have to take tight corners and avoid being hit. I haven’t been shelled on my first two attempts so managed it no so bad. I will be entering any times which happen to be quicker than the one before. I doubt I’ll win though. I’m clumped with a bunch of players, so apparently I’m not one of the better Mario Kart players out there!

I’ve managed to get all my golds though, and I’m down to unlocking 4 characters. Rosalina the hard way, without Super Mario Galaxy! Which means I need a star on all mirror cups. Fun!

Today I got my final paycheck from my job. Ooh yeah, it was a bit more than I thought so I spent some money.

Anyway, haven’t done much since my last post. I’ve been online and played a hell of a lot of Mario Kart. Some people probably think way too much. Things are kind of rocky with my boyfriend I think. I just no longer feel like the priority I want to be. Might be totally selfish of me, but I have shit going on too and he seems to have not really given a shit. But that’s how things go I guess. We’ll see. It’s 4months tomorrow though and my parents still don’t know.

I had the interview with the RSPCA! I think it went well. Now I just have to see if I’m shortlisted and I’m praying like mad that I am. Not sure how long that’ll take. In the meantime I still have to search for other employment.

I saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall at the weekend. You see a penis about 10seconds in! Well, not quite that quick but I definitely wasn’t expecting it. I jumped! I liked the film, one of the better ones I’ve seen recently.

Today I went into town and bought 9 DVDs and a book.

28days later
28weeks later
Bobby
Family Guy - Blue Harvest
Golden Compass
Green mile
Interview With A Vampire
Run Fatboy Run
Simpsons Movie

The book was a Cecelia Ahern book which is called “Thanks for the memories”. I have every book she’s written so far.

In other news I could be meeting someone who I’ve known for a pretty long time. That should be fun! And I feel like utter shit and I don’t know why. Ah, how exciting life is.

I’ve been officially unemployed for a whole week now. So much fun. I’m already incredibly bored and want another job.

On the 8th I actually went out for once. I went to a gig where Shotgun Junky were headlining. Awesome band. Really know how to work the crowd! It was for under 18s. And I’m not under 18. But my friend was a sound engineer and I was primarily there to see him. So good to see him after such a long time! We don’t see each other nearly enough. I also saw his girlfriend who he’s been with for just over a year now. She’s pretty damn cool.

The next day I went to see Meet The Spartans with my younger sister. Not such a good movie. Fairly funny. But 300 sucked too. So yeah.

Then I saw my boyfriend the next day, yay. We just hung around doing what we usually do. But his parents weren’t there so the priority was looking after the kids. Haha, his youngest brother is so cute, he’s only 5 and came up to me playing air guitar!

This weekend, from the 17th until 20th I was left alone in the house. My parents and sister went to Paris for the weekend. So I stayed at home playing Mario Kart on the Wii. Such an awesome game! I actually managed to persuade my Dad to change the router settings so I could play online =D I’m not doing too bad. But I’m not one of the greats. My boyfriend was going to come round. But I was ill. I really do not know what happened to my body. He said I had the lergy and refused to see me =[

Baccccck to today! I got a letter from the RSPCA about a full time animal care assistant job at a rehoming centre! So freaking awesome. Now I just gotta get past the interview *crosses fingers*

Hmm… I’m hungry.

Well, today I got let go. Apparently it’s for some budgeting stuff. So I am jobless as of next Friday. I don’t have to work this week and I’ll still get paid. I’m making my mind up on that. But now I can’t see my crush =[ haha. That was one good person to come out of that place. I knew something was going to happen by the way a couple of colleagues were talking yesterday. Which really annoyed me. My boss said if they were hiring lab staff I’d be fine, but they’re not, they’re hiring shop floor staff and I’m just not good enough or something. But I’ve had no damn training!

So he said I could go home today and I did. So I’ve just sat about doing nothing. Fun.

Also, a little bout of depression has kicked in this week so I’m not feeling totally happy. Yesterday and today have made it far worse.

On the upside I did apply for a full time animal care assistant job earlier in the week which is more hours and more money. I just hope I at least get an interview!

I bought a Wii at the weekend with WiiSports, obviously
WiiPlay
Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?
Happy Feet
Mario and Sonic at the Olympics
Sega superstars Tennis. It’s not a bad console. I just have to get my Dad to change our router settings so I can connect it to the internet, lol.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 3months now and it’s going not so bad. He doesn’t feel like I trust him at the moment, which just makes me feel a lot worse and I don’t know if he gets that. Apparently he’s over thinking things. Thought I might lose him a couple days ago. Ugh, lol.